Movie Review - The Woman in Black

 The movie belongs to the genre of the horror movies of the 60s, where there is haunted mansion, paranormal activities,  candles, graves and a incessantly barking dog. Daniel Radcliffe plays the role of Arthur Kipps, a father whose wife passes away during the the birth of  their son. He sees a mysterious woman in black who keeps appearing and disappearing out of nowhere. The children of the village are made to commit suicide by the woman in black as a revenge for her own child being taken away from her in the past. Arthur refuses to believe the villagers and rubbishes them as their superstitions until he goes to the mansion which is forbidden by the villagers and experiences paranormal activities. The film revolves around Arthur's spine chilling encounters with the ghost and his discoveries about the past of the people who once existed in the haunted mansion.

  In his first outing after the Harry Potter series, Daniel Radcliffe gives a tour de force performance and is convincing as a widowed lawyer. Albeit too young to play a father, Radcliffe brings a certain amount of maturity and credibility to his role despite his approach to the character remaining the same as Harry's.  The streak of similarity between the character of Harry and Arthur is in their courage and curiosity. As someone who has seen all the Potter movies umpteen times, I missed watching the Emma Watson and Rupert Grint alongside Daniel Radcliffe.

   The woman in black remains a mystery and nothing about her past is revealed  except when she is captured in an old photograph that was probably taken centuries ago. The plot could have been more intriguing if the writers gave us some background about the woman in and how her child was taken away from her. A continuity issue occurs when a clean shaven Radcliffe is seen with a stubble in the very next shot. Kudos to the sound effects team for upping the horror quotient.  The breaking of the eerie silence with a deafening screech or the clatter of toys makes one flinch sporadically. The scene where Arthur is almost drowned in the swamp is one of  the striking scenes in the film and is well executed. The movie may have a hackneyed plot with a cliched ending, but it still manages to keep you at the edge of your seat throughout the film. Although the movie is ho-hum in the first half, it picks up tremendous pace towards the intermission. The predictability and the slow pace is a tad bit disappointing. The occasional chills and the impressive screen presence of Daniel Radcliffe makes it an engaging watch. Go for it only if you don't mind watching run of the mill horror movies and like Daniel Radcliffe.

Rating : **

Wherefore art thou, my Valentine?

Another Valentine's day has passed and I'm still single. It's that day of the year when I'm reminded how much being single, being alone sucks! While couples all over the the world go on dates, shower each other with gifts, here I sit alone in my room, blogging about it.

When I'm in a big city, guys constantly ask annoying questions like, 'You're single?' with such sympathy and concern. 'Really?You have no sex life? That must suck! Don't worry, you will find someone. Just be on the look out.' As if being single means being worthless and something to be looked down on. It has sort of become obligatory to be in a relationship even when they don't love each other just to show off their boyfriends/girlfriends. Other unnecessary questions involve, 'How many girls have you been with?' If your answer is less than 3, the response from the guys would be, 'That less? Come on dude, you gotta up your game'. However, the lesser number of ex-girlfriends you have had, the more impressed girls will be. If your answer is 'none', be prepared for the mundane question, 'Are you gay?'

 Contrary to those folks who nag me with uncomfortable and personal questions, there are others (the small town peeps) who exclaim in shock, 'What! You are in a relationship! You had sex?', as if I have committed a loathsome crime. Especially for girls, I've seen them being categorized as 'characterless' if they choose to be in a relationship or engage in pre-marital sex. Such backward, orthodox beliefs are mostly the products of their conservative background. These sort of pervasive thoughts lead to prejudicial fallacies which impede the growth of a modern society.

  What I would really like to ask these judgmental and narrow minded people is to grow up and mind their own business. Your being in a relationship or being single does not measure your value or worth. And for the Judgy Judgersons out there, being in love, losing virginity is one's own choice and it does not make them any less of a good human being.  Well, as for me, just when I was starting to think it was the end of the world for me and I would never find someone again, I fell in love again. My heart skips a beat every time I see her. Could she be the one? Or is it someone else for me?  You never know, she could be reading this post right now! Hopefully, I'll be celebrating Valentines day with her next year.

My first Love Story!

  For someone who cringes every time mallu music blares out of the loudspeakers during the festival season, I enjoyed listening to a mallu song they played this evening which took me back to my childhood.

 It was 1996. I was beaten up by Girija madam for the nth time for getting into a brawl  (I was the only good boy in a class full of monsters). "You look innocent, but you're pure evil." Almost everyone I know has told me that at some point. Well, my answer to those people is that if they are deceived by my looks or my taciturn nature there is pretty much nothing I can do about it. She made me change my seat and asked me to go sit with the class monitor. I pretended to be bereaved by madam's "punishment", but deep inside, my happiness knew no bounds.

 She was the brightest student in the class whose report card was always filled only with 'A+'s. I promised myself to never get into trouble again just so I could sit with her for the rest of the year.  I pretended to be grief-stricken while moving with my schoolbag and waterbottle to sit next to Nismi Varghese who was every teacher's pet. There she sat, a dusky, slightly chubby girl with her hair put into pigtails, making unflattering remarks about me to Neenu and giggling with her. Both her hands were full of bangles, long nails painted in red, she smiled bossily at me told me in her husky voice how she was going to turn me into a better human being. Little did she know that it was an impossible task. A few days into sitting with her, being ridiculed by her most of the time, inanely badinaging with each other we became the best of friends. I used to call her chirikudukka for breaking into laughter at the drop of a hat. She told me she laughed so much only because I made her laugh and that I was a joker. 

 After getting promoted to 2nd standard, I was skeptical of not getting to sit with her ever again. We were ushered to our new class by our new class teacher Mrs. Usha Devi. Everyone rushed into the class catching the seats of their choice. I too found a seat which I liked and made myself feel comfortable there. The next thing I realized was that Nismi was following me and she chose to sit next to me. Because of the boys vs. girls thing we always had in our school, I asked her "Why are you stalking me and why couldn't you choose some other place to sit?" She explained how it was her responsibility to look after me and it was Girija madam's order and not her wish. I shot back by saying that it was meant only for last year. "This year you are free to sit anywhere you like." "Well, I am sitting here because I like this place and I'm not going to let you get away so easily from me." "Damn! Just when I thought I was free again!" I smiled stealthily as I turned my face away from her & thought to myself, 'YES!!'.

  The annual day was near and the whole school was busy with the preparations. She was the lead in a group dance, I would peek into the activity room everyday just to watch her dance. I was not too delighted to see her dancing with Meghnath who was holding her in his arms. There was a reason why I loathed that Junior School Pupil Leader who later also went on to become a School Pupil Leader. On the annual day, I watched her dance with him on the same song that I was referring to earlier; my insides were burning like charcoal. Yeah big surprise, I'm possessive.

 Towards the end of the year, she got transferred to another school. She was terribly missed everyday. During that melancholic phase, I wrote and composed a song called 'Why this Kolaveri di' which was plagiarized 15 years later and went on to become the biggest sensation. Yes, I'm fighting a legal battle against Dhanush. After Nismi left, I felt lonelier than ever. I was made to sit with a girl called Swathi Krishna who had a blinking problem. She told me "Charles is the boss of that bench and we have to obey all his commands." I was like 'Wtf?' She supported Charles every time I had an argument with him. Sycophant! She made me miss me Nismi even more. It is true what they say, you never actually get over your first love.

The '12th' hour of my life

How I miss

Forcing myself to laugh at Maddy's torturous PJs.

JUST LIKE THAT being made to stand outside the chemistry lab when forgetting the lab coat.

Getting scolded by Deepa Madam for using browsing the net without permission.

Trying hard to hear to whatever Maya madam spoke in her feeble voice.

Controlling my yawn every time Aryabhatta mentioned anything about Differentiation & Integration.

Finishing the lunch in 5 minutes in order to finish writing the records.

Running hither and thither to the very few people who had whiteners whenever it was the Record submission date

Reaching the school early to just copy the assignment answers from friends

Discussing the question papers after each and every exam

Sulking every time DCK took up our free periods to catch up on the syllabus

Mimicking the teachers (and some students) when they were not around

Hoping for the assembly to be longer so that Maddy's class would be shorter

Getting linked to any 'random girl' and being teased by friends

Witnessing 'some' teachers' amazing teaching capabilities on the Inspection day.

Hiding behind the frontbencher whenever it was my turn to answer the questions.

Rushing out of the class as soon as the bell rang just to catch the window seat of the school bus.

Regular meetings and appointments with the Principal to discuss important matters (Only the lucky ones had the privilege)

Cribbing & whining about the teachers and their homeworks.

Being creative by giving everyone a nickname, even the teachers (though no one dared to call me any)

Collecting money for the school aquarium and spending some of it on drinks.

Being the newsreader for Aryabhatta house almost every month!


Though I mostly hated my school, I have to admit most of what I am is because of that school. Kendriya Vidyalaya Pallipuram really does prepare you to face the world and I can't thank enough.

The Angelic Witch

You led the way when I was lost
Diminished the darkness with your lights
Never thought I would miss you the most
when we had our frivolous fights.

All those nights you burnt your midnight lamp
Working hard like a bee or an ant
Was only to emerge victorious as a champ.
Proud you did me, by being triumphant

Rolling down the cheeks were my tears
the day you topped in your class.
Ripping apart my greatest fears,
You came across as a sassy lass.

You, the dainty daisy from the dawn,
Blooming with a smile on your rosy petals.
Sing, dear nightingale, sing on!
For the voice that won you medals.

Whenever I was in the melancholy
Of a dark, monstrous thunder cloud
You showed me the silver lining that made me jolly.
You, the clown that made me laugh out loud. :P

When I was kissed by a dementor,
You conjured the Patronus charm :P
So dynamic you were as my mentor
Who snatched away all the hurt and harm.

Helped me in my eternal pursuit
of  knowledge and enlightenment
The ethics and values gripped to your root
Reinforced my conviction in your discernment.

Giggle, giggle, you giggled
Your giggle like a donkey's bray
The way we danced and squiggled
For your beatitude I shall pray.

Sparkles bright like a diamond your dreamy eyes
And that heart of gold.
The accolades you walked away with and the prize
Are worth the talent you sold.

You, the fairy from the heaven,
with an elegant wave of your wand
showered happiness and joy on the seven
While reading this, you shouldn't have yawned.
                  
                             *  *  *  *  *  *
Read the poem and answer the following questions:

1. Pick any of the adjectives you would use for the poet.
   a. Handsome b. Hot c. Sexy d. All of the above

2. What do you think of the poem?
   a. Excellent  b. Brilliant  c. Awe-inspiring  d. All of the above

Jokes apart, I wish my friend, philosopher, guide and sister Rakhi didi a very happy birthday.
Many thanks for being my pillar of strength and support.

                                           
                                                           Rakhi's Rakhi sent by Rakhi

Sibling Revelries

          It seems like only yesterday Rekha was waiting for me in the school bus, beaming at me, saving a seat for both me and my brother Kundan, though she herself didn’t mind standing. She never had any qualms about handing us over all the toffees that she received from her friends. I always wondered how anyone could be so magnanimous and munificent at the age of nine.

        During our school days, I would reach home, worn out from the bland classes, only to hear her dynamically natter about the events and problems in her class, which made me marvel how anyone’s class could be so interesting, how so many things could happen  in anyone’s class every single day! She has to be the most loquacious person in the family. Although her gossips always managed to keep me amused, there were times when I would just brush her aside by telling her how exasperated I was of her teenybopper tales. That would be enough for her to keep sulking for the rest of the day. Though we hardly used to fight, rubbing her the wrong way always resulted in her tantrums. Being the peacemaker I was, I always made it a point to extend the olive branch to her. We got along like a house on fire, always keeping each other engaged with side-splitting stories and cracking up irrationally. But even when I was not interested, I had no choice but to patiently lend her my ears. 

       I vaguely remember an incident that happened when I was eight. It was a bright Sunday afternoon and Monzy (a nickname given to her by yours truly) was taking a catnap. I was lying lazily on the bed, flipping through a magazine which had a picture of the stunning Madhuri Dixit with her fringed hairdo. Coincidentally, my eyes wandered off to a small pair of scissors lying right next to me on the table. An evil, impish idea struck my mind. After picking up the scissors I moved surreptitiously towards her head, gently pulled out a streak of her mane just above the forehead. CHOP! Rekha opened her eyes slowly, waking up from her profound slumber only to find some of the detached hair lying on her face. She yarely caressed her face, gaped in disbelief at the chopped off curls which were now clutched in her bony hand.

        All hell broke loose! Her metamorphosis into a lioness roaring with ire left a lump in my throat. A teary-eyed, shrill Monzy ran hither and thither, her hand firmly held to the fringes of the hair which almost reached her eyebrows. Parents were fuming. Mother’s eyes filled with repugnance for me and empathy for her daughter. No amount of consoling could stop Rekha from bawling. In the midst of all the chaos, Kundan was sitting in the alcove, smirking and giving me a ‘you-are-in-big-trouble-Mister’ look. My heart was loaded with remorse and despondency, my head was hung in shame for the abominable sin I had committed. I couldn’t look eye to eye with anyone.

          

        After a few hours, when she had seemingly calmed down, I diffidently went up to her; and beseeched her forgiveness. Okay, that’s a lie. After the sunset, she herself decided to call a truce. My heart finally started beating again; I breathed a sigh of relief. It was thwarting for me to look into her face when I realized that fringes go only with straight hair and not with curly hair. She had to wear a particular hair band to school for a few months. I still taunt her whenever I see her snap with that hairdo.

     I don’t know if I could have forgiven someone that easily. That is the best thing about her; she never holds a grudge against someone for long.  Not always was she kind and loving. Her volatile mood swings can sometimes make it really difficult to deal with her. Especially when ever she doesn’t get to have her evening tea, she transforms into a cantankerous beast. She is a neatness freak who starts yelling and yapping at anyone who fails to put things back to where they belong. Whenever I was pissed off with her, I would mess up everything in the room just to drive her bananas. Even though she is almost two years older than me, both her younger brothers made sure she was treated like our younger sibling.

     
                I still love peeving her by imitating her and pulling her leg. She is the best cook in the house. Her magical hands have never refused to make me my favorite Sooji Ka Halwa and Beetroot Pulao with lemon pickles. I realized her value only when I started living alone and had to wash all my clothes by myself.  How I miss watching her grumble while doing the dishes every evening! I and Kundan used to take the pleasure out of mimicking the usual ferocious fights between her and Rakhi regarding the division of the household chores. 

     It’s been almost two years since I last met her. Absence does make the heart grow fonder. It’s inexplicable how grateful I am to her for the unfathomable love she has bestowed upon me.

Thank you, Monz.  Thank you for everything.

Wishing You A VERY HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

If I had been with her today, she would have griped about not getting her a present.

PS:  This was in compensation for the gift I have failed to send her this year as well.

I hope I have made up for that.